The Dooce Empire

Greetings, loved ones.

It has been a long time.

Since we last spoke, this humble housewife has become an empire. Soon Oprah will be jealous of her, if nothing else, because Dooce is so thin.

She has produced a child through the miracle of natural childbirth.

She has interfaced with a television company.

She now lives in a mansion that is fit for a Queen--which she is! and her employees, who she lovingly refers to as family.

She has photoshopped 5,884 pictures.

I knew it all along, folks. I can only stand by with awe as my dreams for her come true.

Her daughter now runs from the room when Dooce takes out the camera.

Yes, it has been an amazing journey, and as Frank Sinatra sang, "The Best Is Yet To Come."

I'm Still Here

And have so much to talk about with you!! Stay tuned! Happy New Year, all!!!!

Target Hand Soap and Flor Tiles

Thank you Dooce for introducing me to Target hand soap and Flor tiles. I commend you for your desire to bring your unique and amazing style to us unwashed masses. I hope that one day I can be just like you, living in a stylish mansion off of blog revenue with an adorable child and handsome husband. I can't wait to see what is next in the Style section!!!

The most amazing and wonderful thing is that you are devoting your blog space to this for absolutely no compensation. Forgive me, I'm being verklempt just thinking about it.

How on EARTH can people say that you are aloof and uncaring about your devoted blog readers when you spend most of your time (when not placating a screaming 46 month old or spending much needed relaxation time with your adorable husband) thinking of ways to help us readers begin (I know I can never hope to achieve your level) to live as cool and hip as you do....